Direct Selling Advice… Lesson 9 from the School Playground

17 comments

Posted on 5th May 2010 by Mark in Uncategorized

Direct Selling is about helping others, it is about relationships… we learned about sharing, being nice and helping others while playing on the playground… these lessons often stay with us… sometimes… we just need little reminders… let’s continue on with the 10 Direct Selling Playground Lessons and 10 Direct Selling Strategies…

10 Lessons from the School Playgroundplayground shoes

  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #1 Acceptance
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #2 Be Nice
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #3 Play Nice
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #4 Role Play
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #5 Imagination
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #6 Explore
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #7 Bullies
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #8 Friends
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #9 Teachers
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #10 Rainy Days

Now. Lesson 9…


Yep.  I was going to die.

I kept my head down looking down at my shoes, my sweaty hands wringing behind my back.

“Ok, Mark… tell me the truth.  What really happened out there?”

“You see I was mad…” I began my plea, “Jimmy was picking on Danny because he doesn’t have any hair!  How was I suppose to know there was a rock in the snowball!?”

“Maybe because you made it.”

Ouch.  She was good.  I could hear Taps in the background.  I saw my mother and father weeping.  The shame I brought to the family name.  It was probably good it ended this way… who knows what kind of awful criminal I may grow up to be…

“Mark.” Look at me.

I was going to upchuck any moment.  Guilt is a hard thing to swallow.  I swallowed hard and raised my head.

Ms. Vivian lowered herself to my eye level. “Mark, I know you were angry at what Jimmy did… what he did was wrong and he apologized to Danny… but if it happens again… make sure your aim is better.”

She gave me a quick smile and a let’s-keep-this-between-us-wink.  She stood up and started walking away when she stopped and turned back, “And Tracy… she is ok you just scared her.  Once I explained what happened she thought what you did was pretty brave.”

That day Ms. Vivian became one of my favorite teachers.

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Direct Selling Playground Lesson #9: Teachers

As a child, we had our teachers taking turns overseeing the activities and interactions of the playground.  But what was their role?  They weren’t behind their desk going over our spelling vocabulary… they were outside… on the playground… that’s not a learning environment right?… Wrong.

Teachers’ goals are to teach right?  Teach what?  Simply the subject matter?

No, a worthwhile teacher’s role is far more complex than reading out of some off-the shelf curriculum!

So.. “Yes, teacher’s goals are TO TEACH”… but the best take it beyond the classroom.

4 Corners of Effective Education

Corner #1: Cognitive Education

Cognitive Education is the most obvious, it is about facts & figures, spelling & vocabulary, States and their capitals, history and important dates.  It is about developing knowledge across a breadth of fields in order to assist students in applying cognitive interpretation to their situations.  Effective teachers will develop the critical thinking component in their students… teaching them to THINK on their own.

Cognitive Education on the playground is teaching children the rules of the games, explaining how and why things work the way they do.

In Direct Selling, your team needs to understand what they are trying to accomplish, what the legal parameters are of their opportunities, why certain things are done the way they are.

The phrase “Expectation without Explanation leads to Frustration.” summarizes the importance of Cognitive Education nicely.

Corner #2: Behavior Education

Behavior Education is about how we act.  How we DO things!  It’s the How To.

Behavior Education on the playground is teaching children how to throw a ball, how to catch, how to kick, how to jump rope, how to go down a slide… how to… fill in the blank!

In Direct Selling, your team need to understand HOW TO do things… most people aren’t going to walk in off the streets and know how your team and opportunity performs certain activities.  Sure some people may have sales experience, others may have even been in other direct selling opportunities… even the one you are involved in!  One thing I have learned is everyone does things slightly different.  The opportunity I am involved with has 6 different groups in the SAME city, all involved in the SAME opportunity, each with different philosophies and methodologies towards building it.

When looking at direct selling opportunities, understand, to look at the fruit on the tree of the group you will be working personally with.  Beware of corporate or ambiguous hype… what are the growth, retention and profitability rates of people you will be coached by?

*******

Would you consider using something from 1936?  Odds are it is outdated, obsolete or worst… wrong.

The Direct Selling Strategy for today is a lesson I learned on the playground, but was reminded it’s importance from a book I was recommended when I started with Direct Selling.  A book authored in 1936,  How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.  It is a book I even used when I taught communications courses at college… It is a fascinating read… filled with history, stories and timeless principles.  One of my favorite stories from the book leads us to our strategy for the day,

dog and meat“Pete Barlow was an old friend of mine.  He had a dog-and-pony act and spent his life traveling with the circuses and vaudeville shows.  I loved to watch Pete train new dogs for his act.  I notice the moment a dog showed the slightest improvement, Pete patted and praised him and gave him meat and made a great to-do about it.

That’s nothing new.  Animal trainers have been using that same technique for centuries.

Why, I wonder, don’t we use the same common sense when trying to change people that we use to change dogs?  Why don’t we use meat instead of whip? Why don’t we use praise instead of condemnation?

Direct Selling Strategy #9: Praise

In our Burger King microwave society where we want everything done OUR way right NOW, we have become more abrupt and cynical, rude and demanding, takers not givers.

If you want to stand out in the mind of your customer or team.  Slow down and use some praise.

No this isn’t an alter call… simply learn to lift people up.

Understand: What you edify is repeated, good or bad.

3 Important Praise Tactics

1. Use people’s names.

According to Carnegie, it is the sweetest sound a person can hear.  Figure out ways for you to remember peoples’ names.

I remember a meeting, in my first year of direct selling where an individual happened to be passing through our area and attended a regional meeting.  It was near the end of the meeting when someone recognized him as a very successful direct seller from the east coast.  He was asked if he would be willing to share some of his experience and provide tips for people.  He agreed.  I don’t remember a single tip or story he said, because I was captivated by his using people’s names!   Understand, not knowing anyone when he arrived, he worked the room, mentally noting each person’s name and something about them.  During his training, he would look at people, use their name and mention something they either said to him or something he heard said about them before the meeting by someone else.  I remember looking at me and saying my name, even though I hadn’t talked to him, one of my downline did and told him about recent trip me and that downline took!  I was captivated!  The room was captivated!  By the end of the meeting, he probably recalled 20-25 people by name of people he had never met prior to that night.  Each person walked out of the meeting with the feeling he KNEW ME!

Still to this day, that experience left a lasting powerful impression on how powerful people’s names are.

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For the remainder of this Lesson, watch for the upcoming release of the E-Book “Direct Selling Lessons from the Playground” with extended tips and advice for each of the lessons AND an additional 5 Lessons and Strategies not covered at the blog!!

Sign up for the FRONTLINE NEWSLETTER and be notified when it is released!!

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Your Turn Readers…

What teacher has had the greatest impact on you and why?

17 Comments
  1. Rob Northrup says:

    People love to hear their names, and they like to see their names in big letters (spelled correctly) on proposals. I often put Prepared Especially for: First Lastname on proposals in very large 24pt letters.

    Seize the Day,
    Rob

    Simple Family Survival Tips For Disasters and Emergencies

    5th May 2010 at 8:52 pm

  2. Jennifer Battaglino says:

    not by some calculation but I tend to use the person’s name but then also ask them what they prefer to be called. Being given the name Jennifer, you have ward of people assuming that you like to be called Jen, Jenny, and sometimes people get cute and called me niffer…. So I am very conscious to find out what someone like to be called and then call them that.

    Jen B
    The Harwood Group – Tinnitus, Chronic Illness, Fears, and Anxiety

    5th May 2010 at 9:27 pm

  3. Michelle Mason says:

    Names and recognition are so important. I am not good with praise, either receiving or giving. My expectations are extremely high (too high, I have been told), and so I tend to not say anything unless someone meets or exceeds those impossible expectations. It is something I need to work on.

    I enjoy your childhood stories. It gives us a fun example of what these principles look like in real life.

    Michelle
    Fun and Free Activities

    5th May 2010 at 9:45 pm

  4. Lisa McLellan says:

    I’m always terrible with names because I don’t pay attention. So one time my husband and I were at a wedding where we didn’t know anybody and it seemed like nobody else did either. As each person or couple sat at our table I introduced myself and made it a point to remember their names. Then I proceeded to introduce them to everyone else at the table. It was so funny because everyone was so impressed and it started a conversation about how everyone was so bad with names.

    Babysitting Services, Nanny Services, Nanny Agencies

    5th May 2010 at 10:20 pm

  5. Eileen O'Neill says:

    Very good points about teaching and learning. I personally find understanding the “WHY” essential for me, then the “HOW”

    Eileen
    ESL, EFL, ESOL Teaching: What’s In It For Me?
    Enjoy Being Online here!

    5th May 2010 at 10:20 pm

  6. Michael D Walker says:

    I like how you covered teachers in this direct selling advice lesson from the playground.

    Michael

    The Success Secrets

    5th May 2010 at 5:14 am

  7. Dale Bell says:

    Another great post.

    I agree when we are teaching animals we need to give them praise and recognition. It is hard but can be done when we have just met someone or they have been around for a long time.

    This is an area of my life I know I am lax on and do work on it.

    5th May 2010 at 9:02 am

  8. Sabrina Peterson says:

    I have been very lucky to have several teachers I really loved in school. But my absolute favorite is Mrs. Virginia Havard who taught English at my high school. I opted out of continuing AP English in my senior year so I could have Mrs. Havard as my teacher again.

    Sabrina Peterson, NASM CPT,CES
    Corrective Exercise for Every Body

    5th May 2010 at 1:20 pm

  9. Trisha Chambers says:

    I agree, when a salesman remembers me by my first name it’s always impressive!

    5th May 2010 at 2:09 pm

  10. Shane says:

    Good points and nostalgia.
    I find the emphasis on people’s names can pay off. When I’m consciously doing it I can memorise their names more easily too and that always pays off.

    Shane
    Hypnosis – Change Your Thoughts and Change Your Life -.

    5th May 2010 at 2:09 pm

  11. Tim Van Milligan says:

    I liked it when you said that salespeople need to be trained when they first come on board. Most training is inadequate. A friend of mine recently got a job selling. They sent him to training school for a week, and then sent him to the vultures. Training is a slow process in most cases, as everyone learns at their own pace.

    There is the mechanics of the sales process, such as how to stage everything thing. And then there is the essense of the process; which like you said is more subtle. Using their name is a good tip, as it bypasses their resistence and gets right to the emotion.

    Tim Van Milligan, helping you Make Money Online, God’s Way!

    5th May 2010 at 2:14 pm

  12. Sonya Lenzo says:

    My puppy is going to “Puppy Kindergarten” and it is amazing how fast he is learning, and yes they teach him with much praise…and treats. This works with everyone, I think!
    Sonya Lenzo
    http://www.yourchanceforromance.com

    5th May 2010 at 3:04 pm

  13. Orange County Boomer Dating Expert says:

    Hi Mark,

    btw, I LOVE the photo you selected to illustrate this with rott holding (with such a cute hopeful expression on his face) the piece of the sports ball.

    I remember being blessed having had some great teachers. Ones who befriended me in ways like that when I needed it. When we didn’t always have the good social skills yet to be truly popular with others. There was Mark Pigface who picked on me. When a sibling beat him up over it, the male teacher once he knew the cause just sort of looked the otherway because boys should physically bully girls especially those younger and smaller.

    Praise teaches us what kind of behavior we do want from others in all kinds of relationships.

    Happy Dating and Relationships,

    April Braswell
    Cyberdating Expert and Online Dating Coach

    5th May 2010 at 5:44 pm

  14. Mike Norris says:

    Calling people by their name is what we all need to do. But I have a problem remembering names. Teachers are one of our greatist assets. But they make it so hard for them now that I believe a lot of great people will never enter the teaching profession.

    Mike
    Safety Is Everyones Business

    5th May 2010 at 7:49 pm

  15. Steve Chambers says:

    You hit the nail on the head when it comes to defining the elements of a successful education and/or training. It’s important to remember that while praise is important, negative consequences also have their place as does deserved reward. Meaningless praise is detrimental to learning and education.

    Steve Chambers
    Body Language Expert

    5th May 2010 at 8:29 pm

  16. Peggy Larson says:

    I had a professor in college who I didn’t think much of. Then in the second class I took from him, he walked into the first day of class and went over the syllabus and went on to say he was excited about the class because….and he mentioned each student by Name and said something positive about them. I was amazed at this! Plus, he said he knew I was a good writer! That comment has stayed with me all these years! Praise and using names is very memorable!

    Peggy Larson
    Quilting – Colors and Fun!

    5th May 2010 at 8:32 pm

  17. bryan says:

    How to Win Freinds is a classic. Anyone who is serious about sales shoul get that book. BTW I really like how your stories seem personal when you write them..it engageing as a reader.

    5th May 2010 at 11:06 pm

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