Direct Selling Advice… Lesson 8 from the School Playground

16 comments

Posted on 4th May 2010 by Mark in Uncategorized

Direct Selling is about social interactions and relationships. Since some of our first and most influential social interactions occured on the school playground… we will be exploring 10 Direct Selling Playground Lessons and 10 Direct Selling Strategies…

10 Lessons from the School PlaygroundSmiling Child

  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #1 Acceptance
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #2 Be Nice
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #3 Play Nice
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #4 Role Play
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #5 Imagination
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #6 Explore
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #7 Bullies
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #8 Friends
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #9 Teachers
  • Direct Selling Playground Lesson #10 Rainy Days

Jump into Lesson 8…


“Danny… I’m so sorry…” I whimper leaning on the tree in back corner of the playground away from everyone else.

“Why me?” Danny turns to me with tears rolling down his cheeks.

“I don’t know…” I say weakly

“The doctor’s said I will have about 6 months…” Danny blankly states… “I’m scared.”

Mustering whatever strength I can, “Well… you’re MY best friend… and I will be with you… till the end.” I choke out trying to push back my own tears.

*******

Life is about our relationships.  They often casually enter our lives, many casually pass through our lives, but some… some transcend life itself.  These are the relationships that shape who we become; these relationships are forged through the fires of joy and tribulation.  Those that survive the longest are called friendships.

Direct Selling Playground Lesson #8: Friends and Friendship

When you look at a Playground you see children laughing and playing, many have built bonds with other kids, most are for fun and play… as they grow, they will either grow apart or closer.

I know many of my readers had either frequently moved or were shy and quiet… regardless… while you may not have experienced friendships to the level I share… understand the lessons are for anyone… and it’s never to late to find a best friend… at any age…

7 Building Blocks to Friendship

1. Common Ground-Mutual Disclosure

Playground Kids are drawn to what they have in common.  When two kids both enjoy the same thing, they are more likely to overlook other elements and befriend one another.  It could be similar interest, similar experiences, similar

Direct Selling What is similar? What is familiar?  Work at establishing common ground early on… If you are unable to discern obvious commonalities, then take a sincere interest in them and listen, learning and engage them in their passions… who knows, you might learn something new!

2. Laughter – Building Memories

Playground – Kids laugh at farts (as do many adults I know…) or people tripping or a dog chasing its own tail… they start learning jokes that to adults aren’t funny, but kids will laugh at about anything!  Kids laughter is also very contagious… one starts giggling then a whole group can erupt in laughter.  When they are laughing they don’t care what other people think of them… they are simply enjoying life at that moment.  (unless they are the subject of ridicule)

Memories are anchored more strongly proportionately to the intesnsity of the accompanying emotions… We retell the emotional event more in our mind than the factual event.

Direct Selling – Learn to build powerful memories with your customers and downline.  Learn to laugh together and enjoy life.  Today’s adult world we don’t laugh enough, we have pressure for work, bills, marriage, health, family, etc.. the list goes on and on… if you become the conduit to momentarily escape reality… you become a drug for them.  Now I am not saying to become a comedian, rather, build memories that stand out.  Know your relationships well enough not to offend them.  Laughter is simply one way of building a memory.

Direct Selling Strategy #8: Keep It Personal

Keeping It Personal is a strategy of deepening and extending your influence on your existing relationships.  It is positioning YOU as their ANSWER.  It is knowing and caring more about your team and your customers than they expect from you.  It is about raising the bar through providing very exclusive service TO THEM.

Direct Selling is about relationships.  From establishing, to cultivating; from nurturing to servicing the goal is to enhance the lives of people around you through your opportunity’s offerings.  There are 3 Progressive Tactics that can be implemented to leverage “Keep It Personal

Keep It Personal Tactic #1: The Dossier

If we were to sit down face to face, what could you tell me about your best customers or downline? What about your newest customers or downline?  What do you know about them?  What are their goals?  What are their strengths?  What are their weaknesses?  What does their dossier contain?…

“Wait?!… their WHAT!?” 

A Dossier, or profile, is a collection of information you should have on each relationship of your business… It doesn’t have to be complicated or sophisticated… but have something! 

Dossier“Well, where do I get this info?”

Three primary sources:

  1. Listen… they will tell you most of it…
  2. Social Media, like Facebook… it is scary what some people reveal to the world!?…
  3. 3rd Party, talking to an associate, friend, family member will also reveal items of note…

I do an exercise with my team where I pass out four 3×5 notecards. I have them assign one card to their best customer, one card to their top performing downline, one card to their newest customer or downline and one card to their coach.

  • Write 3 things you know about them.
  • Write what is that person’s dream/goal?
  • What is their most immediate need?
  • What is the best memory you have created with them?
  • What is the last memory you have created with them?

I give them 5-7 minutes/person.

Couple key things to point out…

  1. How engaged are they in these key relationships?  What are they doing good? What can improve?
  2. Are they creating memories or just a notation on a calendar?  How are they standing out or blending in?

This provides great insight on where they need work in developing their communication and marketing skills.

*******

For the remainder of this Lesson, watch for the upcoming release of the E-Book “Direct Selling Lessons from the Playground” with extended tips and advice for each of the lessons AND an additional 5 Lessons and Strategies not covered at the blog!!

 Sign up for the FRONTLINE NEWSLETTER and be notified when it is released!!

*******

Your Turn Readers…

How or where did you meet your best friend (or your closest confidant)?

16 Comments
  1. Ben Waugh says:

    I must say this is a great article i enjoyed reading it keep the good work :)

    4th May 2010 at 11:54 pm

  2. Scott Sylvan Bell says:

    People like to buy from their friends. Jeffery Gitomer says “people do not like to be sold but they love to buy”. If the process isn’t about the buyer the answer is always no.
    Scott Sylvan Bell
    Now go implement!

    4th May 2010 at 12:29 am

  3. alam ghafoor says:

    I like the exercise you do with your team…..what a great way of finding out desires, wants and needs.

    http://alamghafoor.com

    4th May 2010 at 2:11 am

  4. Rob Northrup says:

    I love this.

    Friends are probably the best thing we can have in life. (Relationships in general)

    Harvey Mackay has his “66″ link here http://www.harveymackay.com/pdfs/mackay66.pdf and in his book how to swim with the sharks he goes on and on about customer knowledge as the key to success.

    We need to genuinely care about our relationships and this becomes easier.

    Seize the Day,
    Rob

    <Simple Family Survival Tips For Disasters and Emergencies

    4th May 2010 at 6:34 am

  5. Dewayne Chriswell says:

    All good relationships are based on a knowledge of the other persons needs and personal desires, marriages friendships, even casual working relationships. It’s very cool that you’ve narrowed this down to a very direct exercise to help others identify these. Everyone benefits.

    http://dewaynechriswell.com

    4th May 2010 at 8:54 am

  6. Dale Bell says:

    I like the 3×5 cards and how you expect your team to know about their clients and teammembers. With the cards you know who is listening and paying attention. What a way to build relationshhips.

    4th May 2010 at 9:09 am

  7. Sonya Lenzo says:

    My best friends are from second grade. Yes I still have them. They would do anything for me and I for them. Nurturing friendships and relationships is what we are here for.
    Sonya Lenzo
    http://www.yourchanceforromance.com

    4th May 2010 at 9:12 am

  8. Michael D Walker says:

    Another great piece of direct selling advice from the playground.

    What advice would you give for learning these details from online customers
    who typically are very resistant to divulging personal information?

    Looking forward to the ebook!

    Michael
    The Success Secrets

    4th May 2010 at 10:55 am

  9. Tim Van Milligan says:

    I really like the phrase you used: ” if you become the conduit to momentarily escape reality… you become a drug for them.” I have thought about my product that way, but not about “me” being the drug. I’ll have to work on the ideas you suggested.

    Tim Van Milligan, helping you Make Money Online, God’s Way!

    4th May 2010 at 11:07 am

  10. Michelle Mason says:

    Yes! Dossiers are so important. I have a big problem with my medical doctor, because every time I see him (about once every 6 month), he asks me where I go to school. Now, I am 29 years old, and have been out of school for quite a while. Every time I have to explain this to him. And all I can think is, if he cannot be bothered to remember or write down personal details, how can he handle my health?

    I try very hard to remember personal details about our customers, especially ones I come face to face with. If possible, I write a note in their file to help remind me. It makes them feel special, because I remember who they are.

    I think this is possibly the number one way to connect with customers. Everyone wants to be remembered.

    Michelle
    Fun and Free Activities

    4th May 2010 at 12:23 pm

  11. David says:

    It clearly is all about relationships.

    David
    Marin County Roofers

    4th May 2010 at 1:09 pm

  12. Orange County Boomer Dating Expert says:

    Hi Mark,

    My closest friends indeed are those with whom I have been friends the longest and we went through both middle school trials and tribulations, the joy of rock music, being intelligent/nerdy in high school, eating at Hoagie Haven and Thomas Sweets Ice Cream in Princeton. They were present at my very small intimate wedding and were supportive when my husband died and during the time of his being treated in NY. It’s about sharing what is real in life that is the stuff of the best relationships in life, yes?

    Me, I get to see their darling babies become toddlers and then children.

    Happy Dating and Relationships,

    April Braswell
    Cyberdating Expert and Online Dating Coach

    4th May 2010 at 1:48 pm

  13. Peggy Larson says:

    I’m happy to see the ebook coming soon! I enjoy your down-to-earth writing style. I feel like you’re a friend and I don’t even know you!

    Peggy Larson
    Quilting – Colors and Fun

    4th May 2010 at 3:30 pm

  14. Mike Casey says:

    wow I am just blown away by all of your articles and there is so much useful information in them . Friendships are crucial not only in life, but also in business and relationships for sure. You never know what you might need or what might come up and friends are a important part of this.

    Mike Casey
    http://www.stemcelltherapyresearch.com

    4th May 2010 at 3:44 pm

  15. Eileen O'Neill says:

    Mark, great points: keeping a dossier can sound a little like spying, but I think it helps people who may be memory-challenged to remember the important things about the people who should be important in their lives.

    Eileen
    ESL, EFL, ESOL Teaching: What’s In It For Me?
    Enjoy Being Online here!

    4th May 2010 at 10:30 pm

  16. Shane says:

    Excuse me, I have to erase my face book blogs now!

    Shane
    Hypnosis – Change Your Thoughts and Change Your Life -.

    4th May 2010 at 2:03 pm

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